"When the unthinkable occurs, when humans turn violent against each other as happened at a Texas elementary school earlier this week, we immediately ask ourselves, “How could this have happened? How is this possible?”

"How do I manage the sadness I feel given all that’s going on in the world?"

"A dear friend of the family passed away almost three months ago. Fran was like an elderly aunt to me and my older sister Ruthie, and it has been hard for me to process the loss. I’ve reached out to Ruthie to talk about it, but she doesn’t want to. How do I get Ruthie to talk about Fran?'

"I understand that these are exceptional times what with Covid-19 and all, but lately I’ve been really critical! I criticize everything my husband suggests (I know he’s just trying to help, but his ideas aren’t that great). What can I do to be less critical of him (and actually, less critical in general)?"

“For three years I’ve served as the president of our condo association. We have a congenial board and I keep our meetings pleasant, but efficient; we all have plenty of other things we need to do. That all changed four months ago when Laura joined the board. She is cheery, but opinionated. Productive, but assertive. Upbeat, but bossy. We clashed almost immediately.”

"It’s difficult to feel ignored when praise is passed out, especially when you were half of the team that created the company."

"Fear can be a good thing. It’s often an early warning that something needs our attention. When you find yourself feeling fearful, stop and pay attention to what’s going on around you. Is there a reason to be afraid? If so, can you do something about it?"

“The idea of making New Year’s resolutions is popular in our culture not because we’re a world of primary Wood personalities. Instead, I think the popularity of resolutions suggests that each elemental personality can and does connect with the idea of a fresh start.”

“As we say goodbye to 2021, I once again offer you The Five Elements Blessing.”

"During this holiday season, I would like to remind us that at its core, the Five Elements model really illuminates how five unique parts contribute to the balance and survival of the whole. And that can mean any whole."

"Each elemental personality will respond to winter in predictable ways depending on how balanced they are within their own elemental personality and how that personality relates to the seasons as represented in the Five Elements model. Let's take a look!"

Every year about this time, in the name of holiday harmony I post a brief reminder of what’s likely to matter most to the people in your life (and to you!) during the holiday season. These observations are based on the known priorities and preferences of our primary elemental personalities. There are also a few suggestions regarding ways to keep the season happy for everyone at the same time.

"I’ve always had a tendency to get headaches when stressed. Not surprisingly, I’m pretty stressed these days so am having more headaches. I’ve even found myself rather short-tempered when things take too long to happen or don’t turn out the way I want them to. Any tips on managing the headaches?"

"One week from today is Thanksgiving Day here in the US. And while the exact origin of the holiday may be unclear, the intent of the day still rings true: there is always something to be grateful for in our lives. Whether it’s that we have stayed healthy during a pandemic, had the support of friends and family during difficult times, experienced success in whatever way we define it, or even just made it through another year, gratitude is a state of mind that’s a universal part of the human experience."

"My 12-year-old son has always been a funny, outgoing, and expressive guy, but lately I’ve caught him lying to me. It’s not about big stuff, but it’s still very concerning. Lying is completely unacceptable behavior as far as I’m concerned, yet whenever I try to impress rules and regulations on him, he just laughs and teases me about being a “fuddy-duddy.” Is lying suddenly okay these days?"

"Feeling scattered usually comes from too much energy in the Fire element and the goal is to balance the excess Fire energy without overdoing it."

"Summers with Jim have been a dream; I feel free, funny, and in love with everything. But when school starts, I throw myself into teaching and our relationship takes a 180-degree turn. I do love him and want it to work between us for a long time, but why do I stop loving him every Fall?"

"I’m familiar with the Five Elements model and how the elements keep each other in balance by either giving energy or taking it away. And in the model, that makes sense. But when that gets applied to people, I don’t understand how controlling someone can ever be good."

Question:How do I manage the sadness I feel given all that’s going on in the world?

“I’m writing about my older sister. We always did things together, but ever since she married a few years ago, she doesn’t have time for me. We still live in the same town, but now she’s “too busy” to go to the park or even meet for coffee outdoors.”